The Anatomy of Santa

Okay, so things have been a wee bit hectic here. 

There is still so much to be done.  The shopping has only just begun. 
The cards and baking will have to wait.  Will we ever be finished at this rate? 

While trying to get just a teeny tiny bit of shopping done before Jackson's nap today, I found myself waiting at a counter inside Macy's.  Macy's is NOT Jackie's favorite part of the mall.  There really isn't anything that interesting to look at, and he knows he's not getting out of his car to go explore which is ALL he wants to do these days. 

But there we were, and so I bent down next to him to have another talk about Santa.  You see, Jackie really understands that word and he loves listening to whatever Mama has to say regarding the jolly old elf.  We have several places throughout the house that feature figures or images of Santa, and Jackie happily points to all of them, sharing squeals of excitement that he knows this guy. 

And we're down 1 snow globe this year because Jackie insisted on freeing him from his domed prison.

Jackie carries his own Santa, a $9.99 special from Safeway that hopped into our cart a couple weeks ago.  It's the softest Santa I've ever felt, and Jackie likes pointing to various parts of Santa's anatomy and hearing me reaffirm what he already knows but can't say.  "Santa's eyes.  There's his nose.  Yes, that's Santa's belly.  Santa's hands.  Santa's ears."  You get the idea. 

But we were all finished with the parts we knew, and Jackie was getting restless.  I needed one more small distraction until it was our turn at the counter.  Just then I looked up, and I spotted it.  Something I knew Jackie would love to fixate on because, like any boy, Jackie loves balls of any kind.  3 huge, red, dangling ornaments. 

"Look, Jackson!  There's Santa's balls!"  And as soon as the words came out, I realized how the heck that just sounded. 

Is that lady crazy??  A couple of other women just looked at me.  One woman laughed. 

"It's just that, I meant, "balls belonging to Santa...that he decorates with...not his actual...ya know..."

Aaaaaaand thankfully, it was finally our turn in line. 

How is your Christmas shopping going?  ;)

 

Thanksgiving Miracle

I thought you all should know that something wonderful happened yesterday afternoon.  And by 'wonderful,' I mean, nothing short of a miracle. 

I received a call from my local library from an employee who'd been contacted by a pet store near the Target where my wallet had gone missing Saturday night. 

It turns out, someone had found it and turned it in!  I must have dropped it or it must have fallen out of my purse either on our walk back to the car, or as we were getting into the car.  I cannot even tell you how elated I was!

When Jackie woke up from his nap, we headed straight to Pet Smart.  When the manager named Danica handed it to me, I was so happy, but also terrified to look inside it, for fear of what may be missing.  "It's okay if there's no money," I kept saying to myself.  "I'm okay with it." 

Danica said she had no idea who turned it in, but it was sitting on her desk and they called the library because they figured my account would be linked with my phone number.  How smart, Pet Smart!  I probably cut off her circulation from squeezing her so hard, then we thanked her 25 times, and skipped back to the car.

When we got home, I opened it slowly and peered inside.  Everything was there.  All my cards, my license, and ALL of the cash.  Every penny.  After almost 4 DAYS of being gone! 

Needless to say, I am feeling so blessed and completely grateful for the extremely kind and honest person out there who turned it in, for the employees at Pet Smart and Target, for Kate at the Mesa Public Library, and for my friends and family who have been praying.

This was such a big deal to me and restored my confidence in the true good that is in people.  This Thanksgiving, I know I am truly blessed.

Thank you Jesus! 

NOT! Your Usual Thankful List

It happened so fast and then it was over.  I was only purchasing Goldfish crackers and 3 books from the dollar section.  My total was $6.00.  I hurried through the line, shoved my wallet into my loosely cinched purse and made a beeline for the restroom.  Jackie had proven once again that he chooses the inopportune time to need the public changing table.  But we were on our way out, and it would only take a minute.  No one but me and one 10-year old girl washing her hands.  And then the janitor popped in to do an all-clear before his restroom check. 

My purse fell off the stroller, but I couldn't reach it to pick it up because that would mean leaving Jackie on the changing table.  I finished changing him and hurried to gather my things, but the color of my wallet is beige and could easily be camouflaged against the tile on the floor.  If it had fallen out, I failed to notice it. 

I got out to the lobby and met Phil and Kayleigh and we headed to the car.  It was pouring down rain.  We were in a rush to get out of there.  The next thing I knew, I was back in the store, a frantic, wet, mess of confusion and panic because I knew that I'd left my wallet in the bathroom.  It had to be there.  That was the last place I'd had it. 

And then everything else happened in slow motion. 
The heart thumping. 
The feeling of heaviness on my chest.
Finding the janitor. 
Asking him if he'd seen a wallet. 
Talking to customer service. 
Waiting as they reviewed the video surveillance. 

Knowing that each minute that went by, my hopes and confidence of getting it back dwindled down to a mere prayer.  I explained my actions one more time to the authorities.  Checked and rechecked my purse, the bathroom, my car.  But it was no use.  I'd left it behind and it was gone.  Just gone.  All of my cards, my license, a chunk of cash.  Christmas money.  Everything.  All gone.   

When we went home that night, I felt bad.  I wished I had been more careful.  Why had I not checked the floor and all around before leaving?  Why did this have to happen? 

That was Saturday night.  Since then, I've been busy closing all of my accounts and securing my bank account. 

Yesterday I got a new license at the DMV.  Little by little, the pieces are starting to get put back together.   

I kept a small hope alive that maybe someone, one honest person, would find it and turn it in.  But I am also staying realistic and moving on.     

Here is what I'm thankful for this Thanksgiving.

• I'm thankful that we are healthy and happy.
• I'm thankful for the two sweet ladies at JC Penney who generously gave me a new wallet.  And this time, I picked out a shade of blue so recognizable that it would be nearly impossible to overlook on a restroom floor.
• I'm thankful for all the nice customer service representatives and managers at Target.
• I'm thankful for another shot at a decent driver's license picture.
• I'm thankful that I had a good chuckle as Kayleigh asked me if you're allowed to get "re-takes" at the license branch.  Thanks, honey.
• I'm thankful that we don't have to hang out at the license branch more often.  Ugh.
• I'm thankful that maybe some kids who need it will have a nicer holiday season with some new found money.  Not to the meanie who took it, only to the kids who will receive gifts.  That's how I've decided my money will be spent.
• I'm thankful that my husband Phil and stepdaughter Kayleigh were so helpful and understanding, helping to take care of Jackie while I paced and cried and cursed and searched. 
• I'm thankful to the Starbucks rep who ensured me that I'd "do better next time" and promised to send me my replacement card as soon as possible.  We're allowed to be thankful for coffee, right?
• I'm thankful for my good friend Sherrie who helped me feel tons better about the whole desperate situation.
• I'm thankful to my sweet little boy who smiled and giggled and cheered me up that night as I gave him a bath.  He would not want to see me upset.  And he helped me get over it quickly. 
• I'm thankful that I really am not sad anymore about what happened.
• I'm thankful that I learned a valuable lesson.
• I am thankful that I'm not one to hold a grudge or keep feelings of hostility inside.
• And I'm thankful that material things can always be replaced.  The people we love are our greatest valuables. 

I truly hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving.  To my family and friends, I love you and I'm thankful for you!  Enjoy your turkey, football, pie, and rest. 

Shut Down What?

When a government shuts down, it can be unsettling, scary even, especially to a kid or teenager.  It looms like darkness from a wrong turn onto an unfamiliar street, and there is little understanding of what can be done or where we go from here.  So, you can handle it several ways.  We chose this way.

While sitting on the couch as a family, we were flipping channels back and forth between The Voice and the news.  Our aspiring learner and uber inquisitive teen was very interested in what was going on in the country and had many MANY questions about the state of our government. 

Anytime there is an opportunity for a nice family discussion as opposed to button pushing on i-devices, we like to choose the talking.  We feel all engaged and stuff.  And we can rest our index fingers. 

Husband and I were doing our best to explain, along with listening to the news anchors who were providing facts about other shut downs in our nation's history. 

In the lower right-hand corner of the news screen, a countdown to the shutdown ticked ominously. 

Other than New Year's or a space launch, countdowns on tv were seldom seen, and this peaked her interest even more!  So while she was busy reading something in front of her, Husband and I exchanged a few private sinister looks, and we nonverbally agreed to discreetly shut down the tv just as the countdown clock reached zero. 

3-2-1 Darkness.  After the tv went black, she immediately rose out of her chair, completely stunned, asking what had happened.  We informed her that the shut down was apparently so powerful that it had reached our local cable company and meant that there was no more tv viewing until further notice. 

With a look of absolute horror and a hint of bewildered amusement on her face, she resorted to the fact that she wouldn't be watching any Drake and Josh, Abbey Lee, or X-Factor even.  It was all "down the tubes."  Pardon the pun.  We really had her going. 

(I would never have done this before dvr, let me tell you) 

She was just about writhing on the floor in painful protest when we finally told her it was only a joke and  turned the tv back on to finish watching The Voice together. 

But it was so much fun while it lasted. 

I am getting coal in my stocking this year, I'm sure of it.

Once Upon a (Who's the) Child?

Did you ever hear the expression,

"One fly can ruin your picnic?" 

While I'm usually the one giving most people the benefit of the doubt, recently, I had the opportunity to see a different, not-so-sweet-side of motherhood at our local children's second-hand store.

I do like Once Upon a Child.  They buy and sell gently used children's clothing, toys, and gear that, sooner or later, you'll need.  Buy, sell, and repeat.  Like a Netflix exchange for baby stuff.

But this particular day, we had no idea what else we'd be exchanging in among the merchandise.     

We entered the store, huffing and puffing from carrying in our load.  It wasn't much.  Just a few (still assembled) large-ish pieces of baby gear that Jackson had grown too big for.

What had once been household staples and baby items I could not do without, were now not only dangerous for him to use, but they were taking up prime real estate in our modest 3 bedroom ranch (Because apparently, the 30% less plastic that Aquafina now uses in their water bottles went straight to the workshops at Fisher Price).

Being the sort of mom that I am, it's not like me to take on cumbersome tasks by myself without enlisting the sort of help that Santa relies on each 24th of December.  Because more hands make lighter work.  Or something like that saying.  Anyway, it was a miracle that we were able to fit everything in the van, believe me.

When the friendly women working behind the counter greeted us, they gave us detailed instructions on how they wanted this to go down.  Operating in a 3-man band, Phil, Kayleigh, and I listened closely and complied with their specific requests, as we took turns with Jackson walking around the store.  We were told that they needed to verify that all equipment was in good working order, tested with batteries AND electrical outlets both, and they would be ready to check us out and give us cash or store credit for our items in about 20-30 minutes.   

The next few moments came on fast and furious.  A few feet away, stood a mother with a toddler around 18 months in age from what my eyes could quickly tally.  I don't know where she was a second ago, but she had suddenly materialized between myself and the counter in about 1.5 seconds, arms flailing. 

"WHAT??!!!  You just told them they could get finished in 20 minutes!!??  You told me it would be at least 45 minutes to an hour and I WAS HERE BEFORE THEM!!!!  That is just not right!!!"

And she went on.  And on.  And on. 

Despondent, the sales clerk looked flustered but stayed professional. 

"Ma'am, we issued you a longer wait time because you have several bags of clothing.  We need to go through each piece and it takes a lot longer.  This other family only has equipment.  The wait time for that is much shorter.  But we will do the best we can to get you out quickly."

The woman was still not happy with the store clerk's response.  But all I could do at this point was look at the face of her adorable child who was oblivious to his mother's rant.  He was so cute.  Sensing possible foul play, I asked Kayleigh to walk with Jackson while Phil and I stayed up front with our stuff. 

It was hot.  And I know that waiting anywhere with a toddler who is awake and ready to roll is as fun as tax preparation on a unicycle.  But she still didn't have to say the things she said next.

"Well!  I am a single mom, and I don't have a husband or anyone else here to help me with MY baby!  Being a single mom is not easy, you know!"  Then, looking DIRECTLY at me, she continued, "YOU'LL SEE.  YOU'LL find out soon enough."   

Bug eyes.  That is what I'm sure I was sporting.  "Wait, what did she just say?" the non-chiming, still calm part of me quietly piped up.  Was she really implying that my husband leaving me was imminent to my future?

Phil muttered under his breath in the direction of my ear.  "I think I know why she's single."

I asked Phil to clarify because I wasn't sure I had heard correctly. 

He nodded.  I had heard correctly.  I could not believe she had chosen to make it so personal. 

Ma'am, I'm sorry you're a single (and crabby!) mom, but that's really not my problem.  And it's certainly not fair to get angry and spiteful just because I have a husband and some extra helping hands! 
(thought, but not actually spoken because I'm such a chicken and I avoid confrontation at all costs)

You could have stuck a fork in me, but I was still not done being completely taken aback.  I stood frozen with a look on my face halfway between disgust and defeat.

She seemed satisfied with herself for being so irate.  Like she'd just climbed Mount Bitterest and staked her initialed flag into the peak with a triumphant hmmph!

But I didn't take the bait.  I exhaled deeply and agreed with my inner self to just let this go.  Inner self, you're such a wuss.

I would have words with my inner self later.   

I amped up the smiles, rolled my eyes for dramatic effect (can you blame me?!), finished filling out the paperwork, and we browsed around, leaving the tigress in search of another piece of meat.  I wasn't going to be anyone's zebra hide today.

What I felt then?  Sorry for her.  I ended up telling myself that she was probably in the middle of an awful messy divorce, was stuck alone with a toddler to fend for herself, and maybe someone had even rear ended her on the way over.  I just wasn't in the mood for a tussle. 

And after the whole ordeal, I used the experience to fuel my thankful tank.  I know I am blessed.  I am fortunate to have a very helpful and hardworking husband, a step-daughter who is second to none and gives me so much of her time and energy, and an easy going little man who makes most days a Mama's dream come true. 

I have my cranky days too.  But this woman reminded me--even if in a rather depraved way--that just because we have the right to free speech, does not mean we need to exercise it ALL. THE. TIME. 

Of course, we'll continue to visit our local resale shop.  But maybe next time, I'll bring my husband, his buddy Ron, my Father-in-law "Nutsy," and our good friend the "Cave Man" along for the ride.

Easter Bunny Got Frisked

I didn't see it coming.  We just went for a leisurely stroll through the mall, and as we descended the escalator, we saw the set.  Flowers, white wicker, a stream.  It had been awhile since I'd been to the shopping center so I thought maybe they had just redecorated.  And then it dawned on me. 

It's Easter Bunny picture time at the mall.  In other words, March Madness had begun.

And in an extremely competitive bracket matchup between Jackson State and The University of Bun E., I put all my eggs in Jackson's basket.

I don't know if it's just because I felt guilty for not having done a picture with Santa, or if it was enticing because there was literally no line.  But there we were.  Suddenly standing past the point of no return where the line of obligation began to form.  Doting parents and eager children waiting for Old Cottontail to get back from his smoke carrot break.  This rabbit had no sense of urgency either, which--when you have a jumping jelly bean for a baby, you'd like to be able to get in and out here. 

Jackie didn't seem to notice the floppy-eared giant until it was our turn to step up.  And when I saw the twinkle in his eye, I wasn't sure what he was going to make of this.  I plopped him on the rabbit's lap and then watched as he looked that bunny up and down.  The photographer asked me his name, and as soon as Jackie heard it, he started smiling, then jumping, and then kicking (hard) in utter excitement while the EB just sat there praying that his special area stay protected.  It was like watching a surfer riding a wave.  Then he started stroking and kneading EB's fur and petting him as if he were a kitten all over his lap.  Have you ever seen a bird with an injured wing flap around trying like hell to get somewhere but unable?  That was our view from behind the camera.

The people in line behind us really enjoyed watching the spectacle, and I have to admit I almost cried from laughing so hard.  I made sure when I picked Jax up, I didn't look directly in the bunny's eyes.  I just gave him an I'm sorry whisper and thanked him for agreeing to holding a kangaroo on his lap while letting us capture a picture-perfect memory.

 

I quickly reviewed the lovely little pricing pamphlet.  Cause POW, this is where they get you.  

 

The "free" package: free smiles, free hugs, free wish taking, and free hand holding. I think we definitely got more than that.  See, you just can't put a price on bunny love.

 

But after our monkeyshines, we were certainly obligated to shell out some green.  The cheapest one (for 3 pictures) was $20.  Bunny, I had no idea it was that bad.  We'll leave you some extra carrots this year. 

 

And also a protective cup to wear for when you see us coming next year. 

Let's get outta here before anyone recognizes me... 



Then and Now

Once I had Jackie, my perspective on life (obviously!) changed.  But what I didn't know was how much it would change.  I became a little more paranoid, sorta crunchy*, and insanely protective of who and what my baby would encounter.  But I'm not telling anyone with children anything new. 

Honestly, I think I was sort of selfish before.  Not intentionally, it's just that something as simple as ordering off a menu at a restaurant while sitting down was a luxury I took for granted.  If the waitress at Denny's were to ask me now how I'd like my eggs--hmmm, over easy, over medium...how about over a plate!  And 5 seconds to scarf them down.  That is all.

Lots of people have told me that once you have a baby, you can't remember how it was before.  That is...sort of...not true.  And kinda funny.  I can remember.  Not that it's a bad thing.  Go on ahead and push your GAME OVER *RESET* button because...welcome to a whole new mind set, rule code, and an entirely new ball game now that someone else is depending on YOU to help raise them into a decent human being.

I like to humor myself and think about the 'then and now.'  My how things have changed.  ;)

Then                                         Now
looking nice..............................making sure I don't stink
counting calories.......................counting minutes til bedtime
dirty mind.................................dirty dishes, clothes, floor, etc. [but still dirty mind ;)]
chai tea......................................"I'm a Little Tea Pot"
changing channels.....................changing diapers
anti-aging cream........................hemorrhoid cream
bookstore...................................booksnore
satellite.......................................night light
itunes..........................................this thing--------------->
trips to the mall..........................trips to the mailbox
big night out...............................Big Bird
10 minute shower.......................10 minutes til I'm asleep
digital alarm clock......................baby = alarm clock
scary movies...............................scary things in diapers
perfume on my neck...................spit-up running down my neck
sucking in....................................bah-ha-ha-ha-ha!
highlights in my hair...................Highlights magazine
rated R.........................................rated tops by moms
crash diet.....................................crash, something else is broken
Book: Pregnancy for Dummies...Pamphlet: When You Think Your Family Might Be Complete
I'll do that tomorrow....................shit, it IS tomorrow
Simon Cowell..............................Simon Says
batteries for tv remote..................batteries for this thing------->
shopping bags..............................bags under my eyes
Katy Perry's "I'm Wide Awake"...Jackson Rinella is wide awake

In life and as a parent, you have to keep changing.  But that's okay. 
It's harder to hit a moving target.

I love the lyrics to this song.  It reminds me to always appreciate exactly where you are with what you have.

She was staring out the window of that SUV
Complaining, saying I can't wait to turn 18
She said I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said I was just like you

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her It's a nice place
She says It'll do for now
Starts talking about babies and buying a house
Daddy shakes his head and says Baby just slow down

'Cause You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
She keeps apologizin'
He says they don't bother me
I've got 2 babies of my own
One's 36, one's 23
Huh, it's hard to believe

But you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this
You're gonna miss this
Yeah, you're gonna miss this

(You're Gonna Miss This
Trace Adkins)

*crunchy (sorry, I realize I'm using a term that some may not be familiar with.  Just click on the link over the word for a simple explanation).

Clipart Sources: http://squidoo.com

Upgrade Me

I am eligible for an upgrade on my cell phone.  And I have been for almost a year now.  I remember thinking last May, I'll get a new phone and have time to learn how to use it before the baby is born. 

Never happened.  And now that I have a 7 month old, the thought of spending an afternoon in a Verizon store where the wait times are longer than the Batman ride at Great America really does not appeal to me. 

But I will get there, eventually.  Meanwhile--it's not like I haven't been making other "upgrades" on my personal life.  You know, like now I need 3-4 ibuprofen tablets instead of just 2.  Upgrade. 

Exhibit A: My shopping habits.  I used to just go to the regular grocery store, but now I buzz on over to the Super Target where I can get my life necessities all in a one stop shop.  I have found that there isn't anything I need that store doesn't have.  Plus as soon as you take 5 steps in the front doors, this is what awaits you on the other side.  The Holy Grail.

{insert angels playing heavenly music here} 

This, friends, is one of my favorite pleasantries and I will forever be grateful that some wise person (probably a mother) decided that this was a good idea.  When I started shopping here, Jackie would sometimes fall asleep in the car seat and I would just take leisurely strolls up and down the aisles while he peacefully napped.  It was the perfect win-win situation really.  But then on a couple of occasions, I got a bee in my bonnet because there was always some whining toddler on my heels screaming and running away from his mommy.  I got pretty good at detecting this, and as soon as I could distinguish the faintest sound of impending nap-threatening danger, I would haul ass running while pushing my buggy as fast as I could in the opposite direction like a jockey atop a plastic red horse named Bullseye.  But now, it seems we have come full circle, for currently, I am the one who has the noisemaker.

So when I see a mom with a teeny tiny one asleep in the cart, I just automatically start going the other way.  I cannot be the pot who called the kettle black, and far be it from me to be responsible for interrupting a Target nap for a baby whose mama is probably so happy and relaxed.  See, God got me on that.  He always does.

Exhibit B: My 5:00 pm used to involve finishing up at work, finding a new fun Happy Hour and grabbing a bite to eat with the hubs, and maybe hitting up the karaoke club or going to a movie. 

Ready for the upgrade?  Ha, here we go.  At 5:00, we are now usually at the park.  Yes-siree, where there are snarling dogs who don't want to be friends, menacing kids on bikes, and roller-blading, headphone-wearing tweens who own the sidewalk.

 

I was strolling Jackie in the park just before sunset.  As I held my (lame, non-upgraded) phone in my hand I started thinking, I should really put some fun music on here for him so I opened up Pandora Radio.  I just get the free version where they limit the number of stations you can have, and apparently I had used them all up.  Critical decision time.  Sorry, Poison, it was time for you to go.  I'll re-program you one of these days, but for now, Toddler Radio will now take your slot.  Just as I had finished making it official, a band of bike-riding punks whizzed by me and almost knocked me over.  I wanted to shout at them that the sidewalk is for pedestrians, but I thought better of it when I realized I was outnumbered.  That, and the fact that we had "Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog" from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse pumping on our stroller speaker reassured me of my decision.  Man, I feel like I used to be so much cooler.

Even with all the nuttiness, I think I'll keep my upgrades.

Clipart Sources:
http://merchandisingmatters.com
http://wpclipart.com
http://worldfullofidiots.com

The Bug That Dropped By

Every once in awhile, you get issued a day that you didn't order up.  Things happen that you didn't see coming.  And in this case, I'm not talking about the good kind of scenario, where you might have a surprise package at your front door or find out that you have enough of a balance on your Starbucks card to buy one more drink.  And it wasn't even the neutral kind of event either, which is still like, "oh cool!" but doesn't evoke much emotion.  You know, like cracking an egg open and finding two yolks, or seeing that someone (other than you) put a new roll of toilet paper on the spool.  Yesterday was a "Surprise, there's your fifth load of laundry for today!" kind of day. 

Poor Jackie got sick yesterday, and he had it coming from both ends.  We just couldn't seem to keep up with the messes.  It went a little like this: Hmm, I smell something.  FOUL.  I pick up Jackie and discover his diaper needed changing.  NOW.  If I'd known what I was about to unveil, I'd have laid down newspaper like for preschoolers about to fingerpaint for this kind of display.  Poor little guy.  After he was all clean, I put him in his swing so I could tidy up.  Not even 15 minutes later, Kayleigh and I are smelling it again.  And it somehow got worse.  I pick him up from the swing, and now I have to change the swing.  Shit, that won't fit in the diaper pail.  Take apart the swing, clean off poo.  Repeat diaper process.  Start washing machine again.  After the THIRD time, I just put him (clothes and all) right into the bath tub.  Later at dinner time, I gave him some rice cereal and squash.  About three-quarters of the way through, I saw a look I've never seen before on his face, and like a frog whisking his tongue out to score that passerby insect, I grabbed the nearest towel--not quite just in time, but almost.  All of it came right back up.  At 25 times the speed that it went down.  A day that started out as a quiet song was now in full crescendo. Serenity now!  I think I could actually hear the Southwest Airlines voiceover man saying, "Wanna get away?" in my head. 

Anyway, after all that and two baths later, he finally crashed for the night, and today he seems to be feeling much better.  He never had a fever, thank goodness.  But no matter what, seeing your child go through any kind of discomfort is difficult.  The happy little camper handled it better than me though.  Other than a little mild protesting from how often I was dressing and undressing him, he seemed to be in normal cheerful spirits.  And luckily, Kayleigh had the day off of school so she was there to assist me with our little bug (no pun intended). :) Thank you so much, Kayleigh!  I owe ya, big time.
*************************************************************
Jackson has been honing in on his skills and he's a real slick nickel when it comes to his dexterity.  He's been busy being Jack-in-the-box operator, piano player, and block tower tester.  He is definitely a "hands on" kinda guy. 

And just a little shout out to my mom...

Mom, now I get it.  I totally understand why you...

...kept a shoebox full of medicine in the cabinet. A novel idea.

...seemed to always have piles of miscellaneous papers/mail/junk on the counter. It goes into that "I'm-going-to-read-this-some-day-soon-just-not-today" pile.

...insisted on using Baby Magic. I know I looked at you like you were some sort of alien when we were shopping at Target that day. You told me it was so much better than Johnson's. Yep. You were right on that one. 

...got less and less sleep the more children you had.

...forgot your children's names sometimes. A lot of times actually.

...sang to us all the time.  It really does wonders to stop an impending fuss spell.

...talked on the phone to girlfriends for HOURS (or so it seemed) because that's what you have to do when you can't really get out of the house.

...read funny books like Erma Bombeck. Humor is so underrated and so necessary. P.S. No, I don't read Erma Bombeck books. Yet. But I see your point.

...reheated your coffee in the microwave. And then did it again. Too many distractions.

...used alternative words for obscenities while driving. Now I know what you were really thinking when you said, "Use your turn signal, turkey!"  (I should really see someone for my road rage.) 

Panda Express Yourself

Mesa, Arizona is not exactly known for any one kind of cuisine.

And when you are used to living in the Chicagoland area where choices are bountiful and pizza houses are plenty, satisfying that gnawing craving is just not as easy a feat out here in the desert. 
Living in the southwest for 9 years total, I've had to assimilate and take what I can get. 

Let's start with one of my favorites...Chinese food.  My Mom always told me that she ate this food religiously while pregnant with me.  Thank you, Mom for keeping the fried rice flowing.  And she is great at cooking it too, I can attest to that.  So, whether that has any bearing on my love for a good egg roll, I'm not sure.  But I do miss the places that we used to eat: Jade East, Tao Chen, The Rice Bowl to name a few. 

Here in Mesa, the choices are rather limited: P.F. Chang (if you really want to do it up fancy), Pei Wei (Chang's more casual younger brother), and then there's the fast food of Chinese food and my guilty obsession--simply because it is right around the corner from our house--Panda Express.  W

hile pregnant, I probably visited the place twice a week just to get my sweet and sour fix.  It certainly is not anything to write home about, but sticky white rice with some concoction of peppers, pineapple, onion, asparagus, and string beans just hit the spot for me.  Not to mention those fried won tons filled with cream cheese and green onion. 

Well, on a recent visit, I took Jackson in the car seat and went in to get some dinner to-go.  It was pretty busy this particular night, and behind me in line was a mother with her son about 5 years old.  He was pointing out things that he wanted to eat, and I was simultaneously getting my food packed up in little Styrofoam containers. 

That night's fare included this really rich--and not so calorie conscious--honey walnut shrimp.  He told his mom that he wanted what I was getting, to which she replied, "No, that's not very healthy at all.  It's not good for us because it's fried." 

(Of COURSE it's not healthy, that's why it tastes so good). Mind you--she was looking RIGHT AT ME when she said it.  With a look of disgust. 

And then she went on and on about making the healthier choice, blah, blah, blah...Really, Madam???  Must you look at me with such contemp?  I was sort of just shocked that she was more concerned with my food's nutritional content than being a good example to her son.  Not exactly a sweetheart.  And hasn't she ever heard of "everything in moderation??" 

Well, anyway, I paid and passed up the "Health Department" on my way out, and decided not to really care about what she had said.  C'est la vie, and to each their own.  Mine tasted wonderful and I bet hers was just okay. 

Little lesson here:

Express yourself if you must, but don't be condescending

For little ones pick up on the messages you are sending.

Does this bath tub make me look chubby?

Helping with the laundry is hard work...
I think I'll just take a rest in this warm basket of clothes.

 

I was standing in line at Starbucks when...

I was standing in line at the Starbuck's inside the Safeway grocery store, and had just ordered my iced tea when a complete stranger came up to me, and said, "Honey, I'd like to pay for your drink today."  Um, okay...I thought, do I know this person?  I told her that was so sweet of her to offer but she didn't have to pay for my drink.  Well, but she insisted.  She told me that she saw me standing there and wanted to do something nice for me.  After basic introductions, she went on to say that she doesn't ever go to Starbucks, but that she had a gift card that she wanted to spend and make someone smile that day.  "Are you sure?" I asked again (cause I had news for her that I didn't just order ONE drink--I had ordered TWO).  She didn't care.  She paid for them both.  And then she asked me when the baby was coming, put her hand on my belly, and recited a prayer for a safe and smooth delivery for mama and baby.  Normally, I might have been very taken aback, but I felt very at peace with the whole meeting.  We had a nice little conversation, I let her know how much I appreciated her kind gesture, and we parted ways.  What a nice way to start my day.  You just never know what's going to happen at any given moment.  Thank you, Barbara at Safeway.

It's been like that for a few days now.  I have little angels just doing wonderful things for me everywhere I turn.  And it's like the nicest thing ever to relish each distraction as a break from the worry and nerves I've been trying to ignore with each passing day.  Whether it's just a friendly text to check in, a visit or a phone call, I appreciate all the concern.  Just within the last week, I've had several little "deliveries" made to me at work by kind family members and friends including: a cozy new pair of slippers, a smoothie, homemade banana bread, a cool caprese salad and popcicle on a hot day, and a box of cream puffs.  I am just so thankful for the people that are taking such good care of me and looking out for my well-being. 

So here we are with *18* days to go!  We are rounding 3rd base and headed for home plate folks.  But I'm not running toward the finish line, of course.  It would look more like a waddle at this point.  I'm taking my time because I'm still convinced that this little guy is going to turn.  One common thread that I've noticed in talking with lots of mommies who've been there before me is that by the time they are at this point, they are so anxious just to get the baby OUT that they are willing to go through whatever pain is necessary just to find relief.  Me, I am NOT in that same boat.  I have been so lucky with this pregnancy.  Other than being concerned about his position and the normal first-timer jitters, he is not causing me ANY discomfort, and I am still sleeping somewhat comfortably at night.  I really have no complaints.  The only thing I can't seem to shake is the series of intense dreams I'm having at night.  I guess the natural anxiety of upcoming labor and new responsibilities fuel some strange flights of unconscious fancy.  But you can't have dreams if you're not sleeping so again, no complaints here. 

This mama is happy these days.  Although I am very excited to see my little one's face, I am in no hurry to bring on the ouchies either, so I'm taking this last couple of weeks or so and making the best of it.  I'm trying to convince Phil that we need to do a "Babymoon" this weekend, just go somewhere--the two of us--and soak up the last drops of "freedom" we have before the craziness commences.  So, hopefully, if feeling up to it, we'll do something, maybe just get to a pool and relax or out to dinner.  Kayleigh is leaving today with her mom and step-dad's family on a 10-day cruise.  Lucky girl, I know!  She was worried about leaving for fear that she might miss the baby's arrival, but Phil and I have assured her that he will come when he's supposed to come, and that little brother would never hold it against her if she's not there for his immediate entrance. 

We have one more ultrasound next Tuesday to check baby's size and position.  From there, I have a feeling the doctor will either say we're good to go, or want to schedule a c-section if he still hasn't moved head down on his own by then.  If the baby decides to turn before the c-section, surgery can always be cancelled.  Nothing like waiting til the last minute.  But such is life.  And we can't really get frustrated at him because both of his parents either A) work well under pressure, or B) have been known to procrastinate from time to time.  (I'll let you guess which one is which). 

We're also watching for these memorable June dates on our calendar...perhaps our little one will share a birthday with a friend or loved one: Tara's birthday (15th), Father's Day (17th), Bryan's birthday (20th), Fletcher's birthday (22nd).



Saw my little baby's nickname on a wine label and had to take that shot! 



At an anniversary party for good friends...
that's not sweat on my face, it's called a "glow."
Okay, it's sweat.  We're upon hot times here people!

Problems and Solutions

Sixteen years ago this weekend, I was feeling the anxiety and flutters of excitement getting ready for the Chesteron High School Senior Prom. 

Wow, how the time does fly.  This weekend--16 years later--I am faced with similar feelings but for very different reasons.  It seems like I am on an "excitement high" that I just can't come down from.  Waiting and anticipating the arrival of my first born child is the most awesome, exhilarating, butterflies-in-tummy feeling ever!  I am in "preparation mode" right now--doing lots of laundry, organizing clothes by size, putting things together, and *trying to* put things away and make the clutter seem smaller.  But with just a few short weeks left to go, sometimes it feels like we'll never be ready.  And being overwhelmed comes almost on a daily basis as I struggle to keep myself calm and relaxed.  It's not always easy to stay calm and relaxed when you are nervous and feel like jumping out of your skin with anticipation. 

Just a couple of nights ago, I experienced major frustration as I tried to figure out how to loosen the straps of the car seat.  I was able to put together the stroller and see how the car seat clicks in and out of its base.  But one very seemingly simple task had me dumbfounded.  It is amazing what will set off the tears when I'm used to being able to figure things out.  I tried everything, but feeling myself near my breaking point, I finally gave up.  The next morning, I saw a young couple with a baby a few months old at the laundromat, and noticed he was in his car seat--a similar one to ours.  Without a second's hesitation, I walked up to the mom and asked her if she would show me how to loosen and tighten the straps because I felt like I was already a bad mom for not knowing how.  She so patiently and sweetly unbuckled her son, and showed me how to do it, and told me that when she was in my situation, she also could not figure it out and had to go on youtube for a video demonstration.  It was actually pretty involved, and I'm glad I had requested her  help because I surely would have broken the darn thing out of frustration in about 1 more minute.  It was this small but significant event that reminded me "not to sweat the small stuff" and to just ask for help.  At my baby shower, lots of moms--seasoned and new--gave me that advice.  It seemed to be a recurring theme.  Don't be afraid to get help--seek out those who have been there, done that.  And I'm so glad that I did because not only did I feel better knowing I wasn't the only one who had experienced difficulty, I learned how to do it and felt much more confident. 

Later that night, Philly took me out to a nice dinner and I had forgotten all about the near-meltdown from the night before.  And when we got home, I re-discovered the bag of candy from the baby shower that I'd tucked away in the crisper drawer of the fridge and found that there were still plenty of my favorites.  I asked Philly if he would please be so kind as to leave me the Milky Way darks--because they are the best--and he so happily obliged.  Not that he really had a choice.  But he is nice and cooperative that way.  And I love him for it.



Thank you to Tara, Janie, Ruthie, Cathy, Jo Ellen and Mary Kay for an AWESOME travel system.  Phil and I have been wheeling it around the house--just practicing--and we LOVE it!



Straps are not as difficult as they appear.  But it would help if I had been able to have a glass or two of wine while assembling everything. 



Baby Jadyn reminding me that sometimes, you're the hammer--and sometimes you're the nail...

...if you have to break something or use extreme force, just check over your shoulder first to see that no one is watching...



...but when the going gets too tough, sometimes, you just gotta walk away.



Homemade Kermit onesie that Ruthie made for the baby.  Love.



Mombo (boppy) nursing pillow from Ruthie and Tara

Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone!  And Happy Birthday to my step-dad Mark!! :)

Mail surprises, music, and mini-mommy-meltdown

Most of the time, checking the mail is rather uneventful.  Junk mail, advertisements, bills, you know how it goes...But this weekend, I found a surprise in my mailbox.  Thank you, Aunt Christy for the adorable little boy outfits!  Perfect for our sports-loving family.  And they'll be just in time for baseball and football season this summer and fall.

We were also able to enjoy a night out to celebrate Valentine's Day early.  We had a great night of karaoke, and then went to see the "Piano Man," a musical tribute to Billy Joel and Elton John.  The man who played and sang was from Manchester England, and he did a fantastic job singing just like Sir Elton himself.  The band was also super awesome.  He even had his wife and son up there with him playing percussion and doing backup vocals.  It was a great night, and little baby boy Rinella enjoyed all the great music.

Sunday, I thought I'd go and look into starting a baby registry.  It sounded like a good idea.  But then, I really had no idea how overwhelming that could be (could some of my sisters and girlfriends please come out here and save me?!)What started as an "I'm just gonna go and look" became 4 hours of scouring the store and looking around at 700 different kinds of car seats, strollers, swings, monitors and such--how does one even know where to begin?  And who knew that someone so little could need so much stuff.  I totally hit the peak of my confusion when I came to the bottles and breastfeeding stuff.  Slow flow, medium flow, fast flow nipples, nipple shields (???), sterilize this, store that...it became a bluuuuuurrrr and I had to call my reinforcements to make sense of it all.  Luckily, after a couple of phone calls, I got some really good advice.  (Thanks Christy and Lisa. :)

Special thanks to Sue for going with me to investigate all this baby gear.
And special thanks to Jadyn Olivia for reminding me to register for kitchen cabinet locks.   

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!  Kisses and hugs!

The Joys of Pregnancy: A Cup, a Calamity, and a Cure

Okay, so actually, this post is somewhat embarrassing, but maybe some of you will understand how one seemingly good morning could turn really bad, really fast.  So, it all started with my morning routine.  Wake up, eat a cracker (just in case of nausea), start making breakfast for Kayleigh, make lunches, and stroll over to the Keurig coffee maker and start a cup of coffee (don't worry, I mostly have decaf or tea).  Usually, I pick something out real fast, add the water, push the button, bada-bing, and pretty soon I hear the comforting sound of the water heating up and pouring out a delicious brew. 

Not this morning.  No.  The coffee machine would not brew.  I talked to it for awhile, and made sure there was nothing wrong with the power or the inside of it.  Then I added more water because that seemed like a reasonable solution.  Still nothing.  Okay, this thing is only like 3 weeks old, I'm muttering, it can't be malfunctioning when what I really really want is just a cup of coffee.  But it was.  I got the manual out and started reading, then proceeded to get more and more frustrated when all the troubleshooting signs pointed to "Contact Customer Service."  This was not good.  I don't have time to contact them.  I have family flying here in two days, and I have no coffee pot.  Okay.  Stay calm.  I was visibly irritated when Phil came into the kitchen and asked me what was wrong.  I told him that we had to go to Macy's right now and get this broken piece of junk traded in for a working model.  To my surprise, he remained perfectly unrattled and said ok--we'll go on the way in to work.

So, he drops me off at Macy's and goes on an errand.  "I shouldn't be long," I said.  "This is just an easy swap out."  Knowing I didn't have the receipt, but being a good customer and a card holder I thought they would be more than happy to help.  The sales lady asked me how I was, and I told her that I was fine, but that I'd be better if she could help me exchange my coffee pot.  I explained to her that it was a Christmas gift, that it had worked without a problem for 3 weeks, and that unfortunately I didn't have a receipt.  Well, she didn't so much mind me not having a receipt, but it was the not-having-the-original-box-that-it-came-in which seemed to be more of a problem to her (who keeps their boxes when they get new appliances anyway?)  So, I explained that I'm sorry I didn't have the box, but that all I wanted was to exchange it for a new one.  She said she didn't know how to do that, so she'd have to call for a manager.  Then she told me that they were short staffed that morning from a meeting the night before, and it might take awhile.  Alrighty then.

After SEVERAL attempts to call a manager, (seriously, this took about 15-20 minutes with no responses) she left the desk and went to find someone.  As soon as she was gone and out of earshot, the desk phone starts ringing.  And ringing.  I really wanted to reach over and pick it up and get the person on the other end to help me, but I resisted that urge.  She came back after about 10 minutes, and said she couldn't find anyone.  She finally got through to someone on the phone, and they told her that I could not exchange the machine without having the proof of purchase or the original box it came in.  Then she looked a little bit alarmed when she saw me begin to sob in the middle of housewares that I really needed a new coffee pot.  I told her I'm sorry, I don't mean to be such an emotional basketcase, but my family is coming into town and I'm having a big party at our house.  I simply need you to exchange it for me.  She then told me to wait there and she left me again...standing there, crying like a baby, uncontrollably--mind you, and with several other customers looking at me like, what's with the head case over there??

After what seemed like an eternity, I hear the click-click of "manager shoes" making their way to the counter.  I think, maybe there is some hope.  By this time, I had had time to compose myself and dry my eyes and pretend that I had NOT just had a breakdown in Macy's over a Keurig.  She explained the same policy to me about the no-box = no-exchange, and told me that they had no way of knowing that I really, in fact, had purchased it from their store.  SERIOUSLY, don't Wal-Mart and Kohls exchange things with no questions asked???  I'm really trying to pay attention to her, but at this point, the tears are streaming down my pathetic face.  I apologized for my reaction, and told her that I am sorry I can't leave here until I get a new coffee pot, one that works.  She told me to wait there, left me again, and came back about 10 minutes later.  Her face was a cross between annoyed and complete pity.  She then said that they would exchange it for me as a one-time deal.  She reminded me about 5 times that they are not supposed to do this, and I really think she just saw how desperate I was.  I hugged her and thanked her and apologized again for my "scene."  This whole ordeal took about 45 minutes to an hour.  And wow, when I left with my new machine, I felt good.  I felt victorious.  But I had a pounding, splitting headache, and I looked like a raccoon that had gotten beaten up and punched in the face.

After all of that, and as the day wore on, I felt more and more like a big loser for not being able to control myself, but man, help a girl out, Macy's!  When I told Phil the story as he came back to pick me up and wondered what in God's name had taken so long, and why I looked like I had just been in battle, he couldn't believe that I'd lost it like that in the store.  Normally, I can keep my composure pretty well in check.  But this is not normal Karen, this is pregnant Karen, and I really had no idea that I had that in me.  We got to work and he had to go out one more time to the post office and Albertson's on a last minute detergent run.  I asked him if he would bring me back a fruit bowl--the really yummy one with all the berries.  He momentarily pondered the fate of the Macy's saleswoman and manager, then looked at me with an expression that said, I had BETTER bring you back some fruit cause I don't want to be the next one that messes with you today. 

Thankfully, there are people out there that can understand how sometimes, things that don't seem like a really big deal to one person, can be a really big deal to another.  I think I helped those ladies at Macy's in a way--I think I helped remind them about the human aspect of working in retail, and to not treat people like a number or an inconvenience.  And I gained an added sense of complete understanding for any pregnant-or otherwise very emotional-woman out there who just wants something to be right and for someone to just say, "Yes, I will help you."  I am happy to say that there is now coffee running into my mug, and there is justice in my world.